Salvation

My mind is having a theological debate with itself this evening, and I felt the need to write about it to try to get my thoughts out and think through it. I'm very much aware that no one will have an answer for me, but I'm still putting it out there and I'm open to thoughts. I am going to try to keep this as focused as possible, though this circular thinking I'm about to throw out there leads me to a plethora of other theological questions. This is why I try not to think so hard, it hurts my brain.

So here it goes...

Salvation?
How do I get to heaven?
Two answers:
1. Be sinless.
2. Faith in the cross.

The problem is neither of these answers make me happy. Clearly I already screwed up the sinless route, so then I go to the having faith in Jesus answer. The dilemma:

As the weeds are pulled up and burned in the fire, so it will be at the end of the age. The son of Man will send out his angels, and they will weed out of his kingdom everything that causes sin and all who do evil.
Matthew 13:40-41

So hold up. I'm supposed to trust that the death of Jesus covers me, but he himself says he is going to weed out those who do evil. PROBLEM! I'm still sinning and doing evil, because I'm an idiotic human being. So there is the whole 'Can you lose your salvation' debate, right? And I start thinking, "Well SHIT, how can I be so sure I've even got it in the first place." This starts freaking me out a smidge, but I'm still going to trust in Christ.

Then you hear the 'better safe than sorry' theory! This really pisses me off. Let's just hypothetically say you CAN lose your salvation, so you take the 'better safe than sorry' approach. I'd say you are literally doing the very thing you are trying to avoid, because you are completely lacking faith in the cross and in Christ. Someone recently tried to validate this idea that we need to sin less "just in case". Well we already failed being sinless, and I'm pretty sure even one itty bitty teensy tiny eeeensy weensy sin is sending our asses straight to hell. So somehow I don't see sinning less as a means of trying to maintain salvation as an even slightly valid option.

I like how this post started as a debate in my head, or more of a freak out sesh really. I'll never know (at least not in this life) whether or not I'm going to heaven, or whether or not I can lose that salvation.

So I am only left with one option:
Trust in Christ.
Remember every day what he did for me.
Remember the cross.
Remember love.